12.16.08: An Incredible Hike


It’s an incredible trip, really, but tonight I am frustrated. We had an amazing day today, but I’m starved for a way to share it. I was unable to charge my camera’s battery because we had no electricity yesterday (due to high winds) and I simply do not have the language skills to share what I saw…in any language, honestly. The gorges, that narrow winding corridor, is beyond my capacity to express! I was overwhelmed by the beauty much of the day. As I set out on this hike with my sister, Khadisa, and father, Mbarek, I had no clue what lay ahead. I only smirked as I reflected on previous hikes – never before had I packed a bag with bread we had baked, meat we had slaughtered, vegetables we had grown, a pan to cook it all in, and, of course, plenty of tea, sugar, and a teapot for a day’s hike.

We began ascending one of the red mountains protecting our village, braving the blustering wind and I assumed that the aerial outlook of our village and its neighboring “duwars” was the pinnacle of view, but it was only the start. I wished my friends were there with me, and my family, as we wound around to the backside of the mountain. My father pointed out caves, “ifri”, where the nomads stay during the summer, grazing their sheep and goats for a few weeks at a time, traveling from place to place. And eventually we began to gather brush, little by little, for what I assumed to be our lunch’s fire.

Last night on TV, we had watched a segment on rock climbing in Morocco. Shear cliffs were scaled by tourists with harnesses and rope. A Moroccan man was making a good living as a guide and we watched as he hammered a web of supports into the mountainside. This was another instance where I was kept quiet by my lack of words, and so I was quite relived by this mountain that we had to climb. No words were needed. Our task was apparent. Together we navigated the steep walls of the gorge, one arm reaching out for the next rock to hold while the other held onto the scraps of wood we had gathered.

Eventually we came upon this “ifri”, a wide cave-like overhang, huge and protective from the wind. Set deep towards the back, a few old water jugs sat in a nook. My sister grabbed one to take a drink. The jugs were collecting water as it dripped steadily from the rock. I watched as my sister put her mouth right up to the rock and let the water drip in. A perfect photo-op. Camera-less, I engrained the image in my brain. A drink of the clearest, purest of water. We used it to wash the vegetables and prepare our tea. My sister set to work right away, peeling the tomatoes as my father gathered more wood. I sat and watched, dumbfounded, as usual.

To interject, I’m exhausted by these days and it’s not due to over activity. Honestly, for all we hiked today, it’s probably still less clicks on my pedometer than an average day dancing and navigating the streets of New York City. Still, what’s exhausting is the constant inability to talk coherently, to understand what’s being said, and what’s happening in the present tense. It’s frustrating to want to contribute – and have the skills to do so, such as peeling a tomato or starting a fire – but not have the means to know when or how to offer help. It puts me to bed early and I sleep late!

As our lunch simmered in the fire, Khadisa and I explored an ifri above us, where a nomad had stayed, evident by the overhang, blackened by his fire. And we continued to page through the English to Moroccan Arabic Phrasebook that my father referenced often throughout the day. It’s Arabic, not Tashelheit, and he knows much more French than English, so many words like “cloudy” or “windy” go through this equation of langages before we arrive at a familiar word on each end. It occurs to me that he wants to talk to me, too. He wants to learn English, and has things about our hike and about his village that he wants to tell me, but can’t.

Khadisa grabs some leaves from a familiar plant and we add it to our tea. Mbarek calls it our “nomad tea” and we all say it’s “delicious”, Khadisa’s new and favorite English word. We keep the fire going as we eat our “dwas”. I sit on a rock that’s been warmed by the fire and Khadisa cooks the jaw of the ram we had killed for Leid. It’s like some extra snack that –thankfully – they didn’t insist that I eat. We left the most insistent family members at home. Today we were free!

The hike back was a different route and while it seemed familiar to Mbarek and Khadisa, it occurs to me know that it may’ve been a route they hadn’t taken before, or had, but was one of many. There were incredible photo opportunities – archways created by fallen rocks, perched like keystones between the walls of the gorge, inlets and ifris, rocks leveled off like tables and chairs.

Khadisa and I wandered and explored while Mbarek stopped to pray. I’d say that one day I’d take pictures of this place, and their culturally appropriate response, “Inshalleh” (If God wills), was as expected. But as we continued to wind along the path of the riverbed, then up and around and over, I laughed at my naivety. To think that I could expect to retrace our path and find this hidden treasure again another day…Inshalleh!

We found a white rock along the way and Khadisa was using it to write her name with the English alphabet on the rocks as we ascended up the backside of the mountain that faced our village. I helped her spell out her name and mine. I showed her that her numbers were the same as mine, hiding my surprise that she didn’t know. But why would she? She’s 15-years-old and I’m showing her how to write her name…in English, duh. Yesterday, she had written my name and hers in Arabic script on my hand. That maze of arcs and dots were foreign to me. Even score.

From above, we saw the hotels belonging to the families I had had dinner with over the course of Leid and also the source of our tap water. My father explained why no electricity meant no water and I asked myself again why they’re not using more wind and solar energy here…

Naturally, we were greeted at home with hot coffee, bread and warm soup. Everyone there tasted the clear spring water we had brought back in our water bottles. Then my mother, father and I went to another home for another holiday meal of cookies, kebabs, and dwas. Here I was stranded with the ladies to chat. Mbarek was with the men in another room and Khadisa had stayed home with the boys.

Y’know, it’s fine. They’re impressed by every word that I utter in Tashelheit, and the attention soon drifts away from me and onto other gossip of the day, but it’s tough. I feel more akin to Hamza, my baby brother who’s finding his first sounds and pushing around, eager to crawl. There was a girl, partially blind, at dinner too. She was perfectly capable of conversing and all the rest, but they were careful to hand her her tea or to help her grab a cookie…There’s a great start to some off-color joke…A blind girl, a baby and a foreigner are in a bar in South Milwaukee...

12.9.2008 The Holiday in Morocco


There are dogs here that get loose from time to time. Usually about five or six of them are on the prowl and I don’t know where they live. They rule the top of the hill.

Other times an unruly group of boys takes their place – none of which are my brothers. The other day I saw them all throwing rocks at a target up on the hill. They were trying to kill a snake. The dogs are dealt with by sticks; the boys with stern shouts.

There is a woman here who is the mother of eight, and she chops wood like it stole something. One rubber-loafered-foot holds that log down, while the other is solidly planted on the ground as she whacks away with the axe. She pulls and splices the log apart piece-by-piece, stopping now and then to greet a neighbor and insist the neighbor stay for tea.

And there is this holiday here that I had never heard of before. It’s happening now, and I’ve somehow found myself in the very middle of it. Holidays, exhausting as they are, now compounded for me by a family that’s five times the size of my own, all excitedly chatting in a language I barely understand about things that I have never known, like painting hands, and new pretty caftans, and killing sheep in the street.

Yesterday we slaughtered a goat, and tomorrow we’ll slaughter a sheep. A short prayer was said before my father slit the goat’s throat. Our mother held the animal’s legs to keep it steady. Blood ran down into the dirt, and we all agreed, “ishqal”. It’s difficult. My father skinned and cleaned the animal. Carefully cleaning and separating each piece as the boys watched or chased one another. One daughter cleaned out the stomach in a bucket.

The goat hangs from a beam in the kitchen of the house now. All the different parts neatly cut, cleaned, and separated and spread out on the table. Last night, as I helped my sister bake cookies, we ate kababs of liver, kidneys, and so on wrapped in fat that my mother had prepared. I was so relieved by how good they tasted, dreading having to swallow down something unbearable during the festivities! The boys were so excited, fighting and counting out the kebabs among themselves, promising me much more “tifiyi” to eat as the holiday continues. With visions of cookies, caftans, and the busy holiday season three-weeks earlier than I’m accustomed to, I fell asleep last night very curious for what’s to come.

11.27.2008: Talking in Tashelheet

The experience of being surrounded by a new language is one that is completely new to me. Language fills the room, and so much I can't decipher. I can no longer filter the sounds directly into my head for processing. There’s a cadence that I recognize but with words, I can barely distinguish one from another. I notice moreso the rhythm and pace of the silences and momentum within the conversations. I push myself to stay engaged. I could just as well be listening to a storm brewing outside, while those around me are privy to the code. They recognize the odd mix of sounds and breaks. Maybe they’re saying common everyday things, maybe sordid, juicy gossip, but unintelligent or wise, it reaches me all the same.

Yet it’s not as if I understand nothing. The world of abstract is quite apparent. The words only a fraction of what there is to understand. I’m relieved that I’ve arrived in Morocco without more knowledge of words. Those in my community can speak freely without any worry of my views or having to include me in the conversation (though they often do). They have this language to give to me before I can return the favor. It’s inseparable from the life, the culture, the people, the day. Like a child, I learn the language from the people I will speak to, doing the things I will need to talk about, in the context of the actions, so that words are not isolated, but carry meaning. That effort or nonchalance that gives meaning beyond a combination of letters is all inclusive. I see that language is strong and intertwined intricately with culture. That becomes a tool of power and a sign of respect. To embody another language is no easy task. Words are potent, but at the end of the day, only a fraction of what gives meaning to what’s being said.

10.27.08 CBT Report


During Community Based Training II, we continued to collaborate with the women of the ATMA weaving cooperative in Ait Hamza.

Taking into consideration my observations and the results of the PACA tools implemented during CBT I, I chose to focus my project on the health of the women, and the physical exhaustion and stress caused by working 40+ hours/week at the vertical Moroccan looms. This issue was one of the top priorities during the Needs Assessment of CBT I, and my suggestion to offer assistance in this area was met with great enthusiasm.

I designed a program to offer the ladies methods and exercises to do with one another, or on their own. These exercises can be done either at home or at the cooperative, wearing everyday clothes, and can be integrated into their daily routine. We began the workshops right away, and I offered six workshops throughout the two week session. The intention was to offer ways to warm and prepare the body at the start of the day, then to relieve stress and stretch muscles in the afternoon. With only slight variance, most of the same 8 women attended all sessions. Even a few of the female PCTs joined the afternoon sessions!

To encourage sustainability, I met with one of the weavers who showed particular interest in my sessions. On a Sunday morning, I met with Ytto, and her daughter, Moona, who studies English at their home. After sitting down to tea, we spent 30-minutes reviewing a series of stretches and strengthening exercises that I felt was appropriate to the weaver's needs and capabilities. With the help of Moona, I was able to explain to Ytto proper ways to approach the exercises, with possible alternatives for varying abilities. Ideally, I will create a pictorial "cheat sheet" of the exercises for Ytto to use as reference.

Because of the enthusiasm and interest of the women who participated in the "tamarin y harakut" (movement exercises) or "rryad'a" (sport), this project far exceeded my expectations. I perceive this as an important project, applicable to many sites in which the artisans are routinely physically active. Preparing the body for work, then relieving exhaustion at the end of the day has the potential to nurture productive workers. This could decrease delays due to injury and sickness, thereby increasing product output. In addition, this method offers an opportunity for socializing and participating in "sport," particularly for women. This can contribute to a sense of empowerment in regards to strength and capability, and an increase in individual awareness, which then could translate to a more positive and communicative work environment.

10.9.08

Ten reasons that I know I'm a PCT in Morocco and not a dancer in NYC:

* I sit through "sessions" nowadays. ("Sit" also encompasses wiggling, stretching, doodling, whispering & twiddling).
* I've transitioned from 250 sq feet and one roommate, to 5 square meters and three roommates.
* I eat a lot of dates.
* I actually get in trouble for sticking my legs up in the air during class. (That's weird)
* I have exponentially expanded my library of acronyms, including TLA (Three Letter Acronym)
* I can tell you that Henna smells like spinach
* The people that I spend the entire day with never see my elbows. (I adhere to "culturally sensitive dress".)
* "Culturally sensitive dress" does not include the gold fringed dress that I wore to the laundromat the last time I did laundry on the Lower East Side.
* I made it through two weeks in rural Morocco and used only 1/2 of a roll of toilet paper, and accrued less than 1/2 a bag of inorganic trash.
* The taxi driver who drove us the 60k back from the countryside never had to stop at a traffic signal, in fact, there aren't any traffic signals, and he barely even slowed down to allow the flock of sheep to cross the street.

9.28.08 Family Life

We've completed our first week of "CBT" (Community Based Training) and with so many adjustments - but so much to learn - it's hard to determine how much we've progressed.

We are managing the Turkish Toilets (Read: Hole in the floor.), the bucket baths and the random hours of operation of the hanut. Language will continue to be our biggest challenge for awhile. After 4-8 hours of language lessons each day, I still return to my host family and can't say much beyond my name and the names of the food items on the table.

Because it's currently Ramadan, the eating schedule has taken some getting used to as well. A After the day's lessons, we're sure to arrive home for l-aftur, the breakfast at sundown. Dates, sweet chebekiya, crushed zmita, bread and more bread, and, of course, tea (with LOTS of sugar) are delicious. After a few hours of studying, I go to be early. I have to, because I have to be up in a few hours to eat again. At 3:30AM, my "mma" calls my name. Sarah! It's time for sHur. Meat, okra or carrots, sopping up the juices with bits of bread from a communal dish. The meal is followed by a flan-like finish. Again, delicious. Finished eating? Back to sleep. But I'm not fasting. I each lunch with the other trainees. I basically equate this eating schedule with college life - except instead of sHur, it's 3:30AM Pokey Sticks and Gumby's pizza.

The reason we are placed in this community is because of a co-operative of women weavers that live here. They're handiwork is incredible. Their current initiative is to begin to spin and die their own local wool rather than bringing in yarn from Fez, nearly two hours away. The PCV currently working with this co-op is helping them to update their brochure to distribute at festivals and conferences. We're here to learn about the community and to practice our technical methods for assessing their knowledge, skills, and attitudes. We'll then design individual short term projects to try to help them continue to improve their situation.

The walk home at sunset is my favorite time of day. One of the other PCTs (Peace Corps Trainees), Maggie and I have the longest walk home. Imagine a small rural village with only one hanut and one butcher in town. We live in that villages suburb. We walk past the cornfields and towards the mountains on a rocky dirt road. The clouds and the sky are incomparable. The clouds are a heavy white, and the the sky this lovely deep cornflower blue.

9.19.08

From Azrou, Morocco; I’m sitting on the rooftop dressed in white. Seems appropriate with the breeze of the evening, the quiet streets, the bold, worn tiles and cushioned banquettes. Can’t claim to be clean, necessarily, but I hesitate to wash the day away, for fear that I may forget new Tamazight words from the day’s lessons. Today we’ve begun to prepare for our visit to the rural villages of the Middle Atlas Mountains to continue our training. For two weeks, starting on Sunday, I’ll be with five other trainees in rural Morocco, learning an obscure Berber dialect called Tamazight. The l’auberge is all a flutter with speculations of what life will be in these new sites and who our host families will be. Language training is going alright, but we have so far to go, and no real method to our learning at this point. We have only to stay positive and allow the future to come. This is not a first choice for many of us who much more often take matters into our own hands. Good for us. Maybe we’ll learn something.

My roommates are brushing their teeth, and the dogs are barking outside; it must be time to get to bed. We’ll start with language first thing in the morning, so I need to get my sleep. So far things are going well. Everything is too new to have time to miss everyone back home yet, and I figure there will be plenty of time for that later on. For now, I’m loving this chance to practice just being here, learning, and sharing this experience with these new people. I feel the threads beginning to connect us together, and trust that we are going to rely on one another in the years to come.